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A Neurodivergent's Guide to Self regulate your Dysregulation


Let's talk about dysregulation, which happens when our brain has a hard time managing our emotions and creates a overwhelming feeling that our body and mind can't handle at times.

What is Dysregulation?

Dysregulation is like your brain not knowing how to deal with feelings properly. You might feel too many emotions all at once or sometimes none at all. Like you have an overwhelming sensation that can manifest in your body and also your mind.

How Dysregulation Might Look

Dysregulation shows up differently for everyone. Some people might have a meltdown where they cry or yell. Others might get really quiet and not want to talk or do anything. It can also make you feel very anxious, angry, or like you're not really here. For me, I get a physical reaction in my body, and my mind goes 100 miles/min. Others can also self-harm and harm others when they aren't aware of what to do, let's be mindful what this may look like and not shame people that do not know how to self-regulate.

What to Do When You Feel Dysregulated

If this happens, try to find a place that's calm and quiet. Do something that makes you feel better, like deep breathing, holding onto something comforting (I call this object anchoring, mind is a little snowboarder), or listening to a favorite song. If that doesn't work, it's okay to ask someone you trust for help.

How to Help Someone Who's Dysregulated

If you know someone who's going through this, be patient and kind. They're not acting out on purpose. Give them space if they need it and be there for them when they're ready to talk or need a hug. You can ask "What do you need right now that will help?"

Tips for Managing Dysregulation

  1. Know what makes you upset so you can try to avoid those things.

  2. Have a list of things that make you feel better like a favorite blanket or a book.

  3. Take a break if things are getting too much. It's okay to step away.

  4. Let your friends and family know how they can help so they're ready.

  5. It's okay to feel and be different. Everyone's brain works in its own way.

  6. Remember, it's okay to ask for help and take care of yourself.

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